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It's quite painful to see people for what they really are. Or yourself for that matter. Interaction with others is a game that contains mostly of lies. You say something, yet think something else. It's a constant battle. You might think that I'm being to dramatic, and perhaps you're right. Maybe I've just become overly cynical but this is how i have seen things for quite some time now. So why am i surprised? It's human nature to lie to get what you want, isn't it? It's sickening but everyone does it. Even myself. So many are not aware of it or just chose to ignore it for personal reason. I didn't want to create another dramatic journal but i need to get this off my chest. Lately i have felt my depression turning into anger. It's ironic though... people ask me to open up, but they can't handle it once i do. Most people think I'm a nice guy and i do my hardest for people to think that, obviously. I mean, who wouldn't want that? I'm sure almost everyone does the same. But my way of dealing with emotional problems have never been through friends. Repressing things is the only way for me. Sure, it's not good for me and even i know that, but i really don't have much of a choice. Sharing them with friends usually only ends in hate or me feeling guilty for not feeling better after a friend tries to cheer me up. It's been like this for as long as i can remember. Though i don't blame my friends for this. don't get me wrong. But after all... it's human nature, right?
Well... this rant has gone on for to long so I'll end it here. Thanks for reading!

It's been almost 4 months now since my last journal update! About time maybe?
Yeah, people actually started to think I left DA. So I'm sorry for my absence which is due to three things: School, work and games! Three things that keeps me occupied! ;3 However, I do have more time to make updates now because of several reasons. One of those is that I don't play World of Warcraft anymore.
It's a great game but it's way to time consuming. And I started to grow tired of it.

Many of my friends say that this is a year of change. I would have to agree on that one, even though I hear that every year. But it seems that it has proven to be correct so far. One of my friends have moved. another one found a great job. And I have been working as well, sort of. And I also know that things will change drastically for me this year.

Look forward to many updates soon!

It get's hard to stay humble when people you haven't even had the chance to talk to thinks you are an arrogant bastard. Any why? Because I’m good at what i do? No, that can't be it... can it? Why would i look down on someone that thinks he/she is less skilled then me? Give me one valid reason!

But that is apparently the reason. People think I’m an arrogant bastard because i draw in a certain way and because I get a lot of comments and favs.

I always try to reply on comments and notes i get, i always read everything i get. And no, I don't always reply. Does that make me a bastard? Does it make me arrogant or selfish? Apparently it does to a lot of people. If i don't drop everything I’m doing to reply to things i deserve to be hated, right?

I have always tried to help and talk to fellow artists on this site and I’ve always tried to be a nice guy. But hearing that people find me arrogant even though i never even spoke to them once just makes it harder for me to keep a friendly attitude towards other people on this site.

But I do know that there are a lot of decent people here. People that show you respect and treat you for who you are and not judge you by the amount of favs, comments or page views you get. If it weren't for them I would kill my account on the spot.